Sunday was Father’s Day, and it’s in that spirit that I’m going to talk a little bit about President Obama’s fatherhood initiative and how it relates to AAUW’s promotion of work/life balance legislation. But before we get into that, let me just tell you that I’ve got one heck of a dad, so here’s a father-son story for you.
Dad and I share a hockey team and a hero: the New York Rangers and Mark Messier. The Rangers have won exactly one championship over the past 70 years, in 1994, and Messier is the guy won it for us. We swear by this man. We call him the Captain or, when we’re feeling particularly reverential, the Messiah.
A few years ago, the Rangers bestowed upon Mark the ultimate honor: they retired his jersey number. It was one of the most memorable nights in Rangers history. A 90-minute love fest filled with standing ovations, video tributes, and speeches galore. To top it all off, the Rangers won that night in a thrilling overtime game. Truly the ultimate night for any Rangers fan to be in the building, especially for someone like Dad, who’s been a Rangers fan for nearly 50 years. He had his eye on Mark Messier Night for a long, long time. And wouldn’t you know it, the hockey gods smiled on him, because Dad got a ticket for the game. And as soon as he got it, he knew exactly what he would do with it.
He gave it to me.
I thought about that night as I was watching President Obama promote his fatherhood initiative at a White House event on Friday afternoon. During the town hall, the president talked about his own experiences growing up without a father present in his life, trying to be a good dad to Sasha and Malia while on the campaign trail and in office, and how all the men in the room could be better role models for their own children.
During the event, President Obama kept returning to the same theme: It’s the little things that make the biggest difference. A good talk. Playing catch. A pat on the back and an encouraging smile. An “I love you” right at just the right moment. As the president said,”Even if it’s just for a couple hours a week of shooting hoops, or helping with homework, or just talking about what’s going on in that young person’s life. Even the smallest moments can end up having an enormous impact, a lasting impact on a child’s life.”
The statistics bear out the president’s message. According to the National Responsible Fatherhood Clearinghouse,”children with involved, loving fathers are significantly more likely to do well in school, have healthy self-esteem, exhibit empathy and pro-social behavior, and avoid high-risk behaviors such as drug use, truancy, and criminal activity compared to children who have uninvolved fathers.” Moreover, various studies on child well-being have shown that paternal love is an important factor in predicting the social and emotional development of children and young adults. Bottom line: Good, loving, attentive dads are a huge positive factor in a child’s life.
It takes a lot of personal responsibility to be a good dad, and that effort should always be put forth at a high level. But in the same way that a little time in a child’s life makes a big difference, a little help from the workplace goes a long way toward balancing the need to be on the clock with the need to spend time at home. AAUW believes that creating work environments that help employees balance the responsibilities of work and family is good public policy. Unfortunately, our family oriented workplace policies lag dramatically and embarrassingly behind those in much of the rest of the world, including all high-income countries and many middle- and low-income countries as well.
AAUW fights hard to ensure that parents don’t have to give up a day’s pay to spend time caring for their families. Bills such as the Healthy Families Act and the Federal Employees Paid Parental Leave Act would make major strides toward improving workplaces for employees with family responsibilities of all kinds. This is particularly true for working women, who today make up a larger share of the American workforce than at any time in our nation’s history. And, in this case, what’s good for moms is also really good for dads.
It’s hard for me to put into words what it meant to experience Mark Messier night in person. What I can tell you is that my dad was responsible for making it happen. It was the sort of thing that fathers do for their sons. And letting them know how much things like this are appreciated and remembered, well, that’s the sort of thing sons do for their fathers.
Happy Father’s Day, Dad.
