Commentary on Jamal Simmons’ “Genders Full of Question Marks” in The Shriver Report — A Woman’s Nation Changes Everything
Jamal Simmons presents a male perspective in The Shriver Report — A Woman’s Nation Changes Everything and discusses the difficult decisions women face when trying to balance their professional careers and home life. In our current economic climate, however, families often need two incomes, and as a result men are now part of a much larger work-life conversation.
Simmons comments on the traditional rules men grew up with: “Go to school, do well, get a good job, meet a good woman, and make enough money to raise a family.” Because of shifting gender roles, men must realize that women are on a roll and will only continue to move forward. Women are successful in the workforce and are now the “primary or co-breadwinners in the majority of American families.” Because of this new landscape, discussions between married couples are changing dramatically, and traditional roles are no longer as prevalent as they once were. As Shriver states, “An overwhelming majority of both men and women said they’re sitting down at their kitchen tables to coordinate their family’s schedules, duties, and responsibilities, including child care and elder care, at least two to three times a week.”
Although they have transformed their careers and responsibilities, women still earn less on average than men do, and as a result they must work longer to earn the same amount of pay. Simmons echoes these realities and reminds us that many individuals still hold traditional views of gender roles in our society. Perception is everything, and even though it is now more common to see fathers pushing strollers and attending baby showers, we must still work every day to achieve balance in our relationships and ensure that we are communicating and being flexible in our independent and overlapping roles.
As I reflect on the most important characteristics I seek in a relationship, I agree with Simmons’ sentiments, especially about having a partner who shares similar values, who is honest about expectations and intentions, and who will be there to trust and rely on when life presents unexpected challenges. Couples and families today can have thoughtful conversations about the significant changes to traditional roles. As women continue to stride toward breaking through the glass ceiling, men should join us in this journey with open minds and hearts. For women to reach our ultimate goal of equality, however, men must fight with us to promote women’s issues and encourage their friends to make work-life balance a priority for all.
